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{"id":749,"date":"2015-06-12T17:13:00","date_gmt":"2015-06-12T15:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mammatrams.wordpress.com\/?p=749"},"modified":"2015-06-12T17:13:00","modified_gmt":"2015-06-12T15:13:00","slug":"alla-gillar-inte-bebisar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mammatrams.se\/alla-gillar-inte-bebisar\/","title":{"rendered":"Alla gillar inte bebisar"},"content":{"rendered":"
Den upplevelse som min f\u00f6rlossning var, p\u00e5 gott och ont, de k\u00e4nslor jag har f\u00f6r mitt barn och inst\u00e4llningen att just mitt barn \u00e4r Guds g\u00e5va till m\u00e4nskligheten delar jag m\u00f6jligen med barnets far och i \u00f6vrigt ungef\u00e4r noll andra personer. S\u00e5 k\u00e4nner alla m\u00f6drar f\u00f6r sina ungar.<\/p>\n
En av mina b\u00e4sta v\u00e4nner h\u00f6ll fest i vintras, och hon ville att det skulle vara barnfritt. Min v\u00e4n har inga barn, hon gillar inte barn och vill helst inte ha dem i sitt hem. Och nej, hon \u00e4r inte en hemsk m\u00e4nniska, elak mot ungar eller osympatisk i st\u00f6rsta allm\u00e4nhet. L\u00e5ngt ifr\u00e5n. Hon \u00e4r bara inte f\u00f6rtjust i barn.
\nHursomhelst, ett kompispar till henne hade d\u00e5 nyligen f\u00e5tt barn, och hon fr\u00e5gade dem om de kanske kunde skaffa barnvakt och l\u00e4mna ungen hemma. Barnet var v\u00e4l 2 m\u00e5nader eller n\u00e5t s\u00e5nt. Mamman tog illa upp, vilket jag kan f\u00f6rst\u00e5; min v\u00e4n kan vara\u00a0lite v\u00e4l r\u00e4ttfram ibland med uttryck som inte alltid landar som det \u00e4r t\u00e4nkt.
\nKompisparet tackade stelt nej, och s\u00e5 var det inget mer med det.<\/p>\n
Samma v\u00e4n hade f\u00f6rdelsedagsfika hos sig f\u00f6r ett tag sedan. Samma kompispar bj\u00f6ds, men vis av erfarenhet var denna g\u00e5ng \u00e4ven barnet v\u00e4lkommet. Paret tvekade, med t\u00f6ntiga och allts\u00e5 s\u00e5rande urs\u00e4kter, men best\u00e4mde sig f\u00f6r att n\u00e4rvara \u00e4nd\u00e5 till slut.
\nMin v\u00e4n \u00e4r \u00f6vertygad om att det var mamman som inte riktigt ville, som inte riktigt hade sl\u00e4ppt ”f\u00f6rol\u00e4mpningen” fr\u00e5n i vintras. Det tror jag med.<\/p>\n
Jag f\u00f6rst\u00e5r henne, \u00e4ven om jag inte h\u00e5ller med. \u00c4r hennes barn inte v\u00e4lkommet s\u00e5 vill inte hon heller komma, de tv\u00e5 \u00e4r ju ett. Ok, det v\u00e4ljer man sj\u00e4lv. Men att bli st\u00f6tt f\u00f6r det k\u00e4nns on\u00f6digt.
\nBarn \u00e4r inte som vuxna; de skriker och monopoliserar sina f\u00f6r\u00e4ldrar, de river saker, de st\u00f6r. De \u00e4r ett orosmoment som inte alltid passar \u00f6verallt, s\u00e5 \u00e4r det bara.
\nAlla vuxna trivs inte med barn, inte ens med mitt. Det \u00e4r l\u00e4tt att gl\u00f6mma f\u00f6r en nybliven mor som tycker att just hennes barn \u00e4r allas sk\u00e4l att andas.<\/p>\n
Min v\u00e4n j\u00e4mf\u00f6r det hela med sin hund;
\n”Jag skulle aldrig ta f\u00f6r givet att min hund \u00e4r v\u00e4lkommen n\u00e5nstans bara f\u00f6r att jag \u00e4r det. Aldrig skulle jag erbjuda andra att klappa honom om de inte bad om det eller visade att de ville. P\u00e5 samma s\u00e4tt f\u00f6rv\u00e4ntar jag mig att bli tillfr\u00e5gad om man f\u00e5r klappa innan man b\u00f6rjar greja med honom.”<\/p>\n
Som sagt, hon \u00e4r inte van vid barn och visste inte att man under f\u00f6rsta levnads\u00e5ret inte kan bjuda mamman utan att f\u00f6rv\u00e4nta sig barnet p\u00e5 k\u00f6pet. Men som mamma kan man inte heller ta det personligt n\u00e4r ens barn inte f\u00e5r vara med.<\/p>\n
Det bara \u00e4r s\u00e5. Ta det inte personligt, j\u00f6sses.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Den upplevelse som min f\u00f6rlossning var, p\u00e5 gott och ont, de k\u00e4nslor jag har f\u00f6r mitt barn och inst\u00e4llningen att just mitt barn \u00e4r Guds g\u00e5va till m\u00e4nskligheten delar jag m\u00f6jligen med barnets far och i \u00f6vrigt ungef\u00e4r noll andra personer. S\u00e5 k\u00e4nner alla m\u00f6drar f\u00f6r sina ungar. En av mina b\u00e4sta v\u00e4nner h\u00f6ll fest […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[208,254,269,311,564,890,926,1210,2157],"class_list":["post-749","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-vardagstrams","tag-barnforbjudet","tag-bebis","tag-bebisbubblan","tag-bebistrams","tag-fodelsedag","tag-hund","tag-inbjudan","tag-mammatrams","tag-vuxenkalas"],"yoast_head":"\n