Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the facebook-pagelike-widget domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6114 Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the wp-2fa domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6114 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/functions.php:6114) in /customers/b/7/3/mammatrams.se/httpd.www/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-server.php on line 1893 {"id":4862,"date":"2017-05-18T10:41:56","date_gmt":"2017-05-18T08:41:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mammatrams.se\/?p=4862"},"modified":"2017-05-31T12:34:41","modified_gmt":"2017-05-31T10:34:41","slug":"den-oundvikliga-varsta-stunden-i-livet","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mammatrams.se\/den-oundvikliga-varsta-stunden-i-livet\/","title":{"rendered":"Den oundvikliga och v\u00e4rsta stunden i livet"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/p>\n

En g\u00e5ng n\u00e4r jag var liten s\u00e5 fick vi en uppgift i skolan: vi skulle intervjua n\u00e5gon med ett g\u00e4ng fr\u00e5gor vi f\u00e5tt. S\u00e5h\u00e4r i efterhand kan jag tycka att det var en m\u00e4rklig uppgift, f\u00f6r det var intima fr\u00e5gor man skulle st\u00e4lla.<\/p>\n

Jag valde att ringa farmor. Hon st\u00e4llde glatt upp med att hj\u00e4lpa mig att g\u00f6ra mina l\u00e4xor, men s\u00e5 kom jag till den d\u00e4r konstiga fr\u00e5gan ”vilken var den v\u00e4rsta stunden i ditt liv?”.<\/p>\n

Farmor blev tyst f\u00f6r en sekund, sedan sa hon:<\/p>\n

”Det var nog n\u00e4r mina f\u00f6r\u00e4ldrar dog.”<\/p>\n

Bj\u00f6rn fyllde \u00e5r ig\u00e5r<\/h2>\n

Bj\u00f6rn fyllde \u00e5r ig\u00e5r, och imorse \u00e5kte han f\u00f6r att vara borta till p\u00e5 s\u00f6ndag.<\/p>\n

Jag hade l\u00e4mnat ett paket och en liten lapp framme p\u00e5 k\u00f6ksbordet till honom p\u00e5 morgonen. P\u00e5 eftermiddagen hade jag stora planer; f\u00f6r en g\u00e5ngs skull visste jag vad han \u00f6nskade sig.<\/p>\n

Det blir inte alltid som man t\u00e4nkt sig<\/h2>\n

Strax efter lunch, n\u00e4r Simon somnat, ringde mamma och sa med grunda andetag:<\/p>\n

”Nu har det h\u00e4nt en grej. Jag har pratat med sjukv\u00e5rdsupplysningen och de sa att jag ska \u00e5ka in akut. Om jag inte har n\u00e5n som kan skjutsa mig s\u00e5 f\u00e5r jag ringa efter ambulans. Kan du k\u00f6ra mig tror du?”<\/p>\n

Blodet isade sig i \u00e5drorna, allt jag ville var att kasta mig i bilen men \u00e4nd\u00e5 sa\u00a0jag:<\/p>\n

”Jag m\u00e5ste vara\u00a0realistisk: det tar mig en kvart att f\u00e5 in b\u00e4gge barnen i bilen och minst 5 min att k\u00f6ra till dig.”<\/p>\n

”Ok, ja, jag ska g\u00e5 in och se om grannen kanske kan k\u00f6ra mig. Jag ringer tillbaka.”<\/p>\n

Hennes grannar \u00e4r pensionerade och mycket trevliga, och gubben st\u00e4llde naturligtvis upp. Mamma ringde tillbaka och meddelade mig, och p\u00e5 fr\u00e5gan hur det var fatt sa hon att hon hade ett enormt tryck \u00f6ver br\u00f6stet, hon hade mycket sv\u00e5rt att andas, och hon hade b\u00f6rjat domna i ena armen.<\/p>\n

Jag h\u00f6rde hennes r\u00e4dsla, orden dr\u00f6p av den och jag blev lika r\u00e4dd som hon. N\u00e4r vi lagt p\u00e5 blev jag vettskr\u00e4md.<\/p>\n

Jag ringde min bror och beskrev situationen, sen sjukhuset jag gissade att hon \u00e5kt till f\u00f6r att kolla att hon kommit fram f\u00f6r HON SVARADE INTE P\u00c5 SMS. Paniken sl\u00e4ppte n\u00e4r hon h\u00f6rde av sig och sa att de h\u00f6ll p\u00e5 att ta prover och grejer, och att hon nog skulle f\u00e5 stanna \u00f6ver natten.<\/p>\n

Med den kalla r\u00e4dslan\u00a0dansande i bakhuvudet under eftermiddan, som den envisaste l\u00e5ten du n\u00e5nsin f\u00e5tt p\u00e5 hj\u00e4rnan,\u00a0var\u00a0jag distr\u00e4, k\u00e4nslig och ot\u00e5lig. Bj\u00f6rn kom hem tidigare som avtalat, men jag kunde inte t\u00e4nka p\u00e5 n\u00e5t annat \u00e4n min mamma.<\/p>\n

Efter middan \u00e5kte jag hem till henne och h\u00e4mtade lite saker innan jag k\u00f6rde till sjukhuset. Jonas var redan d\u00e4r, han hade \u00e5kt direkt fr\u00e5n jobbet.<\/p>\n

”Hej gumman,” sa mamma, s\u00e5g min blick och fortsatte med ett n\u00f6jt litet flin i mungipan: ”du beh\u00f6ver inte sk\u00e4lla p\u00e5 mig. Det har din bror redan gjort.”<\/p>\n

Det \u00e4r n\u00e4mligen s\u00e5 att min \u00e4lskade mor har typ 2 l\u00e4gen: p\u00e5 och av. Hon har med andra ord sv\u00e5rt att ta det lugnt, sv\u00e5rt att ta till sig vad det inneb\u00e4r f\u00f6r henne att ta det lugnt n\u00e4r v\u00e5r husl\u00e4kare sagt \u00e5t henne att g\u00f6ra det. S\u00e5 f\u00f6r oss \u00e4r det liksom inte ov\u00e4ntat att n\u00e5nting h\u00e4nder till slut.<\/p>\n

Den dagen kommer<\/h2>\n

Allts\u00e5 vi ska alla f\u00f6rlora v\u00e5ra f\u00f6r\u00e4ldrar en dag, det \u00e4r naturligt, jag vet! Men min mor \u00e4r 63 \u00e5r gammal, det \u00e4r ingen \u00e5lder. Hon ska leva MINST 10 \u00e5r till, helst 20. Bara vid tanken<\/em> p\u00e5 att beh\u00f6va leva resten av mina dagar utan henne k\u00e4nns det som att jag inte f\u00e5r luft. Som att det \u00f6ppnas ett stort h\u00e5l inuti mig, s\u00e5 att det bara \u00e4r skalet av mig kvar.<\/p>\n

”Man v\u00e4njer sig aldrig,” sa Bj\u00f6rn innan han \u00e5kte i morse.<\/p>\n

”Nej, det \u00e4r klart, men jag skulle hellre veta att det var p\u00e5 v\u00e4g. Hinna s\u00e4ga det man vill ha sagt, hinna ta farv\u00e4l, hinna prata om det. \u00c4ven om sorgen \u00e4r densamma s\u00e5 kanske man klarar av det lite b\u00e4ttre. Jag vet inte hur jag skulle klara att hon bara f\u00f6rsvann. Nu.”<\/p>\n

Sensmoral<\/h2>\n

Jag inser, till slut, efter n\u00e4stan 36 \u00e5r i livet, hur oerh\u00f6rt<\/em> h\u00e5rt bunden man \u00e4r till sin mamma. Det \u00e4r l\u00e4skigt, p\u00e5 s\u00e5 m\u00e5nga plan att jag inte ens vill t\u00e4nka n\u00e4rmare p\u00e5 det. S\u00e5 jag f\u00f6rst\u00e5r farmor. Verkligen. Den v\u00e4rsta stunden i livet m\u00e5ste vara n\u00e4r upphoven till det rycks bort.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n


\n

Bildk\u00e4lla: Unsplash<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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